Recently I discovered that I have a disturbing situation on my hands – and no maintenance man to fix it. I have closet gremlins. They’re those cute little things that lurk in the darkness and wait for you to fall asleep. Then they unleash their wickedness on your clothing – either shrinking it, or stretching it to proportions you never knew existed for ‘that dress’.
I don’t like shopping. Yes, last time I checked, I am definitely female. But I am a female who doesn’t put much stock in material things, and so my wardrobe exists of bare essentials. I also (please contain your shock) only own four pairs of shoes. It’s Spring here, which means that Summer will soon be emerging, and will be bringing with it will unbearable humidity. And I have nothing to wear, all thanks to those gremlins. (All right, the fact that I shop maybe once every three years, and have picked up a little weight has definitely helped them along.)
So I took a trip to a local mall, which really doesn’t have much to offer in the way of clothing, but what it does have has been known to be of the ‘cheaper’ variety – just my kind of place. I like the convenience of this particular mall, as it’s relatively close by and not very busy. I saw a shirt I liked, checked for the right size, and was on my way to the checkout counter when the price of this lovely item suddenly exploded in my brain – not like a beautiful firework display, but more like a devastating bomb. I sighed, and walked back to the rack. I had a look at a few other, not so attractive, options – and then promptly turned on my heel and fled….like a vampire fleeing a clove of garlic!
An hour later, I did the usual mindless scrolling through my newsfeed on my beloved Facebook – and laughed so hard that even the dog was ready to have me committed.
What I saw was this :
There is nothing but truth to this statement where I am concerned! I am trying to do a public service here!
Please drop your prices so that I can spare humanity my nakedness!